Don't Be That Guy

What's going on there people? In this enthralling edition of One Terrible Blog, I'm gonna discuss some muzak with you. What I am going to discuss is this; no one, anyone, should ever cover the following 3 rock artists: Jimi Hendrix, Van Halen, & Pantera. Allow me to elaborate...

First off, all 3 were/are guitar players who cannot be matched. They have a unique voice and style and when others cover their material, it frankly sounds like dog shit. They can't match the vibe or the feel of the originals.

Examples:

Van Halen: EVH is without a doubt one of the most influential guitar players er....ever. The way that he plays off of his brother, Roth/Hager/Cherone, the man with 2 first names/his kid; is unmatched by others.

Pantera: That band just had a groove that cannot be matched or replicated. When ever you see some ass hat on Youtube doing a Pantera cover; it sounds like crap. Also a side note to that...why in the name of all that is good, would anyone, anywhere ever want to hear Zakk Wylde play with those guys? He doesn't have the style to do it. He's all fast stupid pentatonic runs and awful vibrato. Plus if you go onto Youtube you can see him "jamming" onstage with them at the end of Primal Concrete Sledge. One word: supergoddamnfudgingawful.

and lastly....

Hendrix: If you need to know why it should be outlawed covering a Hendrix tune, my only argument is this: search Youtube for Yngwie  J. Malmsteen doing a horrendously terrible version of Voodoo Child. That's it. That's my argument.

Anyways, never ever be the guy who covers anyone those bands unless your name is Edward Van Halen, Dimebag Darrell, or Jimi Hendrix.

(Signature) Signature

This one is rather short and to the point. This little diddy deals with signature guitars, specifically Les Pauls; so here it is. How can someone have a signature Les Paul? A Les Paul is a signature guitar named for yep you guessed, Sean Connery, I mean Les Paul. I mean, is there going to be a signature (insert famous guitar player's name) Dimebag Darrell guitar? No, because it's stupid. It's one thing to have a signature Stratocaster, that is just an existing NON signature guitar. A Les Paul is a god damn Les Paul.
I mentioned this to a former coworker who was a drummer and his response was: "Well, what about signature Vic Firth drumsticks?" My answer was simple: "It's completely different. Vic Firth is a guy and that's the name of his company, like Fender was Leo Fender's company or Marshall was Jim Marshall's company. Les Paul had a signature guitar through Gibson. It's already a signature guitar to begin with. It doesn't make sense."
There you have it, signature series anything, of an already existing anything doesn't make sense.