Well, since the last time I have written anything; some big changes have happened. Some personal problems have come up and as a result, I ended up moving to a new place. AND boy, is this place weird...
Here are some strange things that I have noticed/learned about my new place; partly from me observing and also from talking to my two other roommates (who feel and the think the same things about this place).
First off, there are three of us who live in this place. We each know the landlady by three different names and reach her through three different numbers. This lady is also a hoarder. There is shit crammed into every possible nook and cranny of this dump. In addition to that, she has three vehicles that are also filled with shit.
The landlady has a problem with one of my roommates, because he questions the dumb bullshit that she does. As a result of this, the landlady badmouthed this guy to me and our other roommate before we each moved in. As a result, we figured out she is full of shit and we actually like each other. Also to go with that, she never calls him by his name and if one of us mentions his name, she stares off like she has no idea who we are talking about.
Did I mention that there is a lot of shit in this place? Well there is. To go along with all the shit in this place, there are a shit ton of rats in the attic. Like if you are in the kitchen and it's quiet, you can here them scurrying around, having sex, or doing whatever it is that rats do. Due to the gross nature of this place, we all keep all of our personal belongings in our rooms. Not because of each other, but because it's gross and she has taken some things from past occupants "by accident".
That also reminds me. We all have locks on our doors. Again not because of each other, but from her. When I was going to move in, she offered me a choice of two locks. Two SHITTY locks. One was a combination lock and the other was a key lock; with a key so small you lose it just by looking at it. I told her I was going to buy a Master Lock. You've heard of Master Lock before right? Well, she is the only person in the world who hasn't. I showed her my lock and she was mystified. Oh yeah, there was an old lock on the door that I needed to get off. She said "How are you going to get that off?". I said "Well, don't you have a bolt cutter?". She then shot me a look that said; why would you ask something so fucking stupid? Well when I moved in, I had to get that lock off so how did I do it? I ripped it off with my bare hands. I told her how I did that and she told me it took four guys to put that lock on the door. That's right, four guys.
I will be in this dumpy shit hole of a dump until the end of June and I am very, very positive that this place is a gold mine for this blog. So stay tuned!
No comments:
Post a Comment